Nice try.

–Scene 1–

I’m putting together the snack for the kids in the morning. M requests one type of cookies, the kind that A doesn’t like. Great! Then sees me put a different type of cookies in A’s snack, and changes his mind that he wants that type of cookies. Drat. Pouting ensues when I inform him that A won’t eat the other type, and there’s only one pack of this type, so the odds are not in his favor today. M complains that since there’s only one pack, it means A must have eaten a pack the day before. I move on with my life because there are a million things in the world more important to me than what kind of cookies they eat for snack.

–Scene 2–

I’m doing laundry, and hear a crinkling noise in the pants that M wore yesterday. Hmm, intrigue. What’s that? The wrapper from the cookies he INSISTED that A ate yesterday? AHA. HARD EVIDENCE. I WILL TEAR HIM APART.

–Scene 3–

Me: Oh hey M, look at this wrapper from the cookies A allegedly ate yesterday. You know where I found it?

M: Uhh, where?


M: *sheepish grin*

–Scene 4–

I cry quietly to myself because apparently cookies do matter to me. However, I am unsatisfied by his lack of guilt. Mental note to use this deception to my advantage at a later date.


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